The Joys of Flying… Solo

My boss, let’s call him S., was supposed to fly out of Westchester County Airport to Philadelphia on his way to Dallas.  He ended up on a flight all by himself.  Yep.  He was the sole passenger on the plane.

The morning of his flight, it snowed for the first time all winter in New York, so of course the flights were delayed.  He was rebooked so that he wouldn’t miss his connection in Philadelphia, but then the original flight was delayed to the point that it was leaving at about the same time as the later flight so they, at the super efficient White Plains airport, were rebooking everyone onto a single flight.  Apparently they were paging him prior to boarding the original flight but due to the state of the art acoustics and the clusterf*ck of people stranded in the single waiting room, S. did not hear them calling his name.  But he did hear when they said it was final boarding call.
“We’ve been paging you,” they explained.  
“I didn’t hear it.”
“Yeah, our PA system is terrible.”

Well that flight was leaving so they kept him on the next flight.  By himself.  He walked through gatecheck and the woman didn’t even bother looking at his ticket; she just glanced at him and confirmed “You’re the passenger?”  He walked on the plane and thought- Where should I sit?!  Oh all the options!  (he chose 2B so he could put his bag underneath the seat in front of him) Then he had a moment of anxiety in realizing that he was going to have to actually pay attention to the flight attendant’s emergency exit speech.  But, as one might expect in this sort of situation, he made best friends with her and all was well.  She did give an abbreviated speech, starting with “I see you have your seatbelt fastened, S.” and continuing, something to the extent of, If Anything Goes Wrong, I’ll Just Tell You What To Do.  She asked him what he wanted to drink and brought him the can in her hand (and he was excited because he got to have the whole thing, being that there was no one else to give the second half to).  He told her how I had responded to his email stating that he was the only passenger on the plane with my own hopes that he was running up and down the aisle singing and dancing.  She chuckled.

His next flight was oversold and he was in the last row where the seats don’t go back and a 24 year old  Texan kept trying to engage him in conversation despite his best efforts to avoid him.

Hey.  You win some, you lose some.

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